Haha point

I'm no comic. I'm well aware of the fact that, my frequent attempts to the contrary, I will never be the next big thing in the world of comedic writing.

But I am a foreigner. And an English teacher. And that, as it turns out, is all you need to be qualified to judge an English language joke competition in Kaohsiung!

It was brilliant. After a week of others wondering what sort of horrible butchering of jokes I'd gotten myself into, I found instead a group of marvelous performers who, for the most part, could tell a decent joke!

One of my favorite moments from the evening:

The first performer stands up and begins to speak. In a near flawless British accent! I must say, it actually threw me off for a bit, considering that one of the things I was evaluating was pronunciation, and I'm just not well-versed enough in British accents to know if some of the words he said were said wrong, or said in a British accent. I gave him the benefit of the doubt, and he did a great job with his anecdotal joke of bad husband "Bobby" (easily the most British-pronounced word in the whole bit) who forgets his wedding anniversary. His wife says "When I wake up tomorrow morning, there better be a gift sitting in the driveway that can go from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds." And what does she find the next morning? A bathroom scale. And, as the young comedian went on to note, Bobby had not been heard from since.

For that little gem, he got third place.

The remainder of the (actually pretty short) evening consisted of some hilarious voices, some wonderfully physical comedy, some great comedic timing--and yes, a little nervousness and a few mispronounced words, but generally just great performance after great performance after great performance.

And they did come right on like that: one after the other, many lasting no more than about 45 seconds, and the next person ascending the stage long before I'd finished scoring the person before, let alone making the more detailed notes I was supposed to give each team. I wrote like mad, but even so, when the time came to give notes, I found myself with a gaping hole where my notes for Team 6 should be.

"That's okay," I thought. "I'm sure they'll come up one group at a time for feedback, and when I see who it is I'll remember what I was going to say."

Then the other judge, a professor at NKNU, stood up to say a few words.

"Great!" I thought. "She'll jog my memory and I can go from there."

Then she sat down, having given no more than a few sentences, and all in Chinese. Wait, she isn't giving individual feedback? My turn? Gulp.

I managed something, though, and then the results were tallied, awarding my faux-British friend third, a girl with absolutely flawless English and a pretty good joke to boot in second, and a group of three with a high production quality and even higher energy levels scoring the top spot with their simple, yet well-executed sketch about a tourist and an old man's dog.

And me? Well, I got a doctorate, apparently. No, really:

Easiest 4 years of my life!

Yes, that certificate is thanking me, Professor Rebekah (and I finally learned to doctor pictures for privacy's sake, woo!) for serving as a judge. I like the looks of that! What's better, it reminds me of a favorite college professor of mine who refused to let us call her "doctor" because she technically didn't have her doctorate. Having now been on the receiving end, I say, why not? It's a great thing to be artificially honored!

So no, I'm still not a humor writer. But now, with a full 40 minutes of experience now behind me, I am apparently a full Professor of Comedy! How very appropriate that my title also be a joke...

Who's Who in Kaohsiung

On special request, and since I did absolutely nothing today other than sit around and watch TV (and Skype with Lindsey for an hour an a half, which was wonderful), here's a brief run-down of the people I mention in my blog.

The Roommates
I currently live with Brittany, Rachel, and Karina, all of whom are other ETAs here in Kaohsiung. We choose schools tomorrow, so living arrangements may change, but I hope not--I love living with these ladies.

The Other ETAs
The other Fulbright ETAs here in Kaohsiung are Analicia, Andrew, Emily, Esther, Lydia, Samia, Steven, and Tiffiany. All wonderful people to hang out with. Right now we all live in the same apartment complex, but as I noted above, that will change soon.

Fulbright people
Fonda is our go-to person for just about everything; I think her official title is ETA Project Coordinator in Kaohsiung. She is absolutely amazing, and her patience with us is immense--I can't imagine having to take care of a fresh batch of full-grown infants every year until they get on their feet, but that is, essentially, her job description. Fonda plans everything and tells us what we're doing; sets up all the official stuff for ARCs, bank accounts, scooter licenses, rent and utility payment etc; provides scooters for us to practice on; checks up on us at home (and takes us to the hospital if we need it); and serves a general liaison for anything and everything that could go wrong. She also takes pictures all the time, which is fantastic.

Alex is the ETA Project Chief Coordinator; he lives and works in Taipei at the Foundation for Scholarly Exchange (aka Fulbright Taiwan), I believe, and comes down to visit us on special occasions. He's a great guy, really helpful and friendly, and widely-traveled, which makes for some really fun conversations.

Dr. Vocke is the Executive Director of the Foundation for Scholarly Exchange (Fulbright Taiwan) and he, like Alex, lives and works in Taipei and comes down to Kaohsiung when he's needed. Unlike Fonda and Alex, he's American, and he's been living in Taiwan for four or five years now. He's wonderful to talk to; he's part college professor (he used to be one; calls himself a recovering academic) and regulation stickler and part grandfatherly advice: the perfect combination.

Dr. Wu used to have Dr. Vocke's job; he's a Taiwanese Fulbrighter from a long time ago, and oversaw the Fulbright program in Taiwan for a very long time. He formerly studied and taught in the US, and he is willing to say whatever is on his mind. He's great.

Kaohsiung People in Education
Evelyn hangs out with us a lot; she's a total sweetheart and a friend of Fonda's, and she works at Sanmin as an English teacher . She's also a fantastic photographer and has a great smile. :)

Professor Spring teaches Education at National Kaohsiung Normal University; she is super athletic, independent, and fun to be around. She has been helping teach us the basics of teaching--she gave us a year-long course in theory in a single 3-hour session last week--and is helping set people up to play tennis and swim at NKNU. She's hilarious and free-spirited, and is one of the peoplehere in Kaohsiung who will help us with the teaching aspects.

Professor Lee also teaches Education at National Kaohsiung Normal University; she sometimes goes by "Triple L" because her full name is Lee-Lin Lee (I think? Or maybe Lin-Lee Lee?), and she is really sweet, helpful, and fun. She has been helping us with more classroom-oriented practices, and is great at being hands-on herself. She is our other resource for the teaching aspect of our grant.

Dr. Tsai is the Director General of Kaohsiung Education Bureau, the highest education authority in Kaohsiung. We have had the honor of meeting him twice so far.

Joanne, CJ, and Allen all work at Sanmin, and we have gotten to hang out with them a lot over the past few weeks. Joanne and Allen have gone on several of our outings with us (I rode in Joanne's car to dinner the other night, and she was great to talk to; she told us a lot about Ghost Month in Taiwan), and we get to see them every day in their office, which is right outside our conference room. CJ is the military presence at Sanmin; he speaks good English, has a great smile, and is a lot of fun to hang out with. He also lent us his scooter for the first day of scooter practice, which was great.

I'll add to this list as I think of more people; right now, it's late and I have to be up early tomorrow.